Being a Kid is Hard

by Amber Stiles on May 3, 2012

Being a kid is hard….

everyone telling you what to do

everyone telling you where to be

everyone telling you what to wear…what to eat…what to watch

NO NO NO NO NO

don’t go there, don’t do that, don’t you DARE!

Being a kid IS hard!

Family Photos by Jess Wright

Photo Credit: Jess Wright Photography

I really hope my girls enjoy their childhood and don’t beg, wish, pray to grow up faster because they think it’s easier to be an adult.  How do you show them how hard it really is to grow up without putting undue stress on them about your “real” life?

Comments make me smile!

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

allisonthemeep May 4, 2012 at 1:07 am

Being a kid is super hard. I remember being so pissed about things my parents did and swearing that I would never do that to my kids, and now I am doing those things. Because my adult perspective is a lot clearer. But I still try really, really hard to remember what it was like to be so little and to have those feelings, because I don’t ever want to turn into an adult who doesn’t “get” kids.

By the way, that is a really great picture of Alexa. She looks like she’s trying to take off for flight. :)

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:09 am

I always remember wishing to be older. Because then you get to do what you want. But ugh, you don’t! I want the girls to enjoy their youth. I was a stressy little one and really hope I’m diligent enough to help them name their emotions rather than keeping them all to themselves.

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Jess @ Wrangling Chaos May 4, 2012 at 12:27 pm

(Okay, so all the pics that I took, being all over your site? SO stinking flattering. You totally just made my day.)

Aside from that. Real comment…

A friend recently posted on her FB wall a photo that said “your kid isn’t GIVING you a hard time, your kid is HAVING a hard time”, and it hit me so hard. Because being a kid? It IS hard. Learning to cope with life, not having any idea how to handle anything. I get into parent mode, sometimes, where I totally forget what it was like, being a kid. And I have to remind myself of my own experiences.

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:10 am

There’s so many great ones, I HAVE to use them (btw, I really need to print them and frame them AND hang them!)

I love that quote. Thank you for sharing it with me. I keep thinking about it now when I’m dealing with some of Alexa’s rather big emotions. She’ll tell me that she can’t stop crying while she’s screaming and yelling at me. It makes me realize that she’s not in control of her feelings but they’re there and they’re real.

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tracy May 4, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Ugh, I know. I catch myself saying “No!” 9 million times a day and even I feel frustrated. It sucks. No wonder she said “Daddy is the nice one.”. :(

btw- little blog redesign? I like it!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:12 am

I’m always trying to remember to tell her what I want her to do, instead of what I want her to stop doing. Positive instead of negative or some mumbo jumpbo LOL. I forget often though.

And yes, it’s almost complete I think. I’m still having some things tweaked so it gets wonky from time to time. Thank you though. I really like the feel and color scheme!

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Amanda P May 5, 2012 at 2:01 pm

I am going to have a three year old in a month and a few days. I *was* glad that the terrible twos are over *almost* over. I realize it is hard on them to because they are learning a lot in short amount of time. (got your website from SITSGirls). Thank you for sharing,

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:14 am

Maybe you’ll luck out and things WILL get easier. We didn’t have any terrible twos. Well not really. Maybe when the twos are easy the threes seem even harder?

Welcome from SITS :-)

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Melissa May 5, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Oh, I really needed to be reminded of that today. After having a tough week, I just want to relax and do nothing when I get home … but that is not what my 5 year old wants to do! Thanks!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:15 am

It has to be so hard to be ON after being at work all day. My hats off to you. Peter comes home and Alexa jumps on him as he walks through the door. I kind of get a break with just the baby at that point. I hope your commute home isn’t too terrible so you can decompress on your way home from work.

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Patty@homemakersdaily.com May 5, 2012 at 2:42 pm

And to top it all off, they’re learning how to do everything! My 13 month old grandson has turned grouchy and I think it’s because he wants to walk SO BAD! He’s getting closer but in the meantime he just can’t quite do it.

Think about all the stuff they’re learning – sitting, crawling, walking, holding a spoon, doing stairs, etc. Learning how to live isn’t for wimps!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:17 am

I think that’s really key. They’re bodies and minds are growing so quickly that their psyche is having a hard time keeping up.

Alexa gets really nasty when she doesn’t feel well so maybe it’s sometimes legit growing pains. I KNOW for certain sometimes it’s just low blood sugar.

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gin May 5, 2012 at 2:46 pm

It has to be hard to be so excited and curious about this big, wonderful world and then have some big person tell you NOT to explore it. I know I am this way with my son, who is two and am trying to work on it!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:19 am

When Alexa was first learning to crawl we tried to to say NO unless it was really important. Instead we really worked to use positive statements and redirection rather than just shutting her exploration down. I also tried to make sure our house was safe for her to wander through without constant hovering.

Now that she’s old enough to know how to do a lot more it’s less about saying no to actions and more about trying to keep her emotions in check. I want her to acknowledge her feelings, but to also learn to cope with them. I suck at coping and stress so let’s hope I can teach them to deal better than I do.

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Erin @ Simpmy Frugal Mom May 5, 2012 at 4:14 pm

Lovely reminder. Being a kid is hard. And being an adult (and a parent) definitely isn’t any easier.

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:21 am

Agreed. Life in generally is pretty hard. It’s time we all start giving each other an easier time of it. The world can be so rough, I want family and home to be the girls’ soft spot.

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BarefootMedStudent May 5, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Wow, your daughter is beautiful! I love how you did this from her point of view. Maintain that ability and you’ll both get through every difficult stage in one piece. When I was little, my mom allowed me to pick out what I would wear once a week – once I decided on a green shirt, a yellow skirt and red tights. Because I wanted to look like a traffic light. It was tough, but she allowed it – and I felt wonderful. I think you’re doing a great job – good luck with the terrorist threes!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:24 am

Thank you! It’s the reason I write this stuff down, so I can look back and remind myself when it gets really hard :-)

We totally let her pick out her clothes. I think toddler fashion is hilarious. There are very few times when we enforce any sort of dress code or specific outfit choices.

I agree with you that giving them some semblance of control in their lives is important. Have real choice in how they spend their time, what food they eat, the clothes they wear…it matters. I mean, how could it not? They’re human after all. Teeny humans…but humans none the less.

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Kristi May 5, 2012 at 6:43 pm

The temporary nature of childhood helps me through the tough moments. I remember that although the current challenge may be difficult it is temporary and gone so quickly. But more than that the blessings of three yrs old are also temporary and gone even more quickly. Enjoy every minute. And give them choices when you can. I let my five year old wear the most ridiculous outfits because she enjoys it and it’s not worth the stress between us to fight it out.

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:26 am

You’re completely right. It’s such a short period of time in relation to their whole lives. It all changes so quickly. Just as you’re getting accustomed to one thing a whole new crop of challenges pop up.

I’m not always sunshine and roses and neither should I expect anyone else to be…no matter how bit or small.

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annemarie (@YLMBreadless) May 5, 2012 at 6:43 pm

being three is hard for kids(and us) I found four even harder with my boys. I wonder what Grace (our only girl) is going to be like at 3

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Jamie @ Roubinek Reality May 5, 2012 at 8:23 pm

I feel like 2 has been ridiculously hard for us but I have heard from so many others that 3 is even harder. I’m scared. We will face that challenge next month. {bites fingernails nervously}

Nevermind the fact that I have a baby coming in August. Oh, I’m super scared about having this three year old! I need to try to remind myself that he really is HAVING a hard time, not just GIVING me a hard time.

Great post! Thanks for visiting my blog from SITS! ;)

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:28 am

I’m not sure, maybe it’s an either or thing. I hear a lot of people say that two was hard and three was easy or vice versa. I’m just hoping we get through relatively unscathed so we can enjoy 4. Then I really hope Emma just skips both ages LOL!

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:27 am

Well, at least you’ve done it twice so you know how to expect the worst :-/ I hope she’s easier for you and for her!

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Aramelle {One Wheeler's World} May 5, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Something that is so important for us all to remember on the tough days. Thank you for the reminder!

(Visiting from Saturday Sharefest at SITS Girls)

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Amber Stiles May 13, 2012 at 3:29 am

Welcome from SITS!
It’s been a tough month so it was as much a reminder for my friends as it was for me. I’m glad it helped you too <3

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